10 responses to “Brydda’s story”

  1. Lennon Clark

    This is one of my favorite birth stories…thanks to the mom for sharing! It reminds me in bits a lot of my first son’s birth (though I was the one doing the cervical lip manipulations to myself, if you can believe it!) I just love that birth picture.

  2. Bettie

    What a difference it makes for parents to be in the driver’s seat at birth! Even a long, difficult labor can be a triumph rather than a trauma.

  3. kristi

    Lisa, I don`t really see that you should feel that you had to justify yourself here. She was exhosted. It certainly sounds like you did the right thing to me. I love that you are so trusting and hands off with your moms, not too many midwives out there like that these days. Great job to all involved!

  4. Janet

    Thank you for sharing this story, it is sometimes the reality of birth – hard work. Like life, birth has considerable variation and yet it’s still normal. It sounds like an intense birth with some complex stuff to absorb and integrate along with the usual transition to motherhood complexities women manage around birth. I look forward to hearing your reflections in a few years too, mama, maybe after another birth even. Love to you, and thank you for giving us the opportunity to witness such a powerful story.

  5. Anna

    Thankyou so much for writing this story and sharing it. I gave birth to my daughter at home with a midwife 5 weeks ago and feel completely traumatised by it. I experinced the complete lack of control and the fog of pain you talk of and i also had a cervical lip which had to be held out of the way and a second degree tear. ‘The most harrowing and shocking experience of my life’ sums up my feeling as well. In a home-birth community where there is an expectation that a ‘successful’ homebirth should be a wonderful, empowering, awsome experience I feel isolated in my horror of what happened to me and am battling guilt, anger and grief. At this point i feel like there’s no way i would do it again, but reading your story has given me hope that I will overcome these feelings and eventually look back on the birth as a learning experience. Thankyou for keeping it real, and telling it like it was.

  6. Diana Kirke

    Thanks everyone for reading and commenting xox

    Anna, I feel for you. For a while I felt embarrassed to express my difficult feelings around the birth to other homebirthing friends who had had more ‘wonderful, empowering, awesome’ experiences than I. But the more I expressed the more I felt supported and able to come to terms with my experience. Now I realise that even though it wasn’t a smooth, ecstatic birth, it was wonderful, because it brought me Brydda, it was empowering, because it empowered me to know my body and myself better, and it was awesome, because I was awesome. I pushed my beautiful baby out of my vagina.

    So please talk to your friends, your midwife, or to other women you feel might understand (like me- email me at marie.diana.kirke@gmail.com).

    You pushed your beautiful baby out of your vagina. You are awesome.

  7. Steve

    Just to say thanks – I’m going into hospital tomorrow fo ra prostate cancer operation – I’ve spent hours trying to find a +ve – & there you guys were – thanks!

  8. Christa

    Lisa, I was wondering if you could expand upon your comment that you would not advocate manipulating the cervix? What would you recommend?
    By way of background, I had a cervical lip during my last labour. I visualized it melting away like butter and then gently pulled it the rest of the way. I instinctually did this myself but is there perhaps a better way?
    Thank you for having such a wonderful blog. I have learnt so much this week reading all your posts. Your words are like gold to me! :)