Luke warmly on the heels of Look Who’s Talking is Look Who’s Talking Too. This time it’s a baby girl, a cord around the neck, an emergency caesarian section and more of the same – only worse.

Too Much Talking Too

It’s very unusual for a movie sequel to be better than the original. But don’t be alarmed, Look Who’s Talking Too sticks to the tradition of being considerably worse that it’s predecessor. But what happens when the original was already a stinker? I mean how low can it go? Well put it this way, if John Travolta had started dancing they could have retitled it Look Who’s Limboing Too.

Look Who’s Talking Too is not surprisingly a rehash of Look Who’s Talking, but to maintain the gimmick of hearing what the baby is thinking without it actually talking a new baby girl is thrown into the mix. Of course her older brother is still in the movie, which brings us to a major spanner in the works. The brother looks at least 3 years old, but the movie implies that he barely old enough to talk. So sometimes his mouth moves and no words come out, other times his mouth is closed and his thoughts come out and more usually his mouth moves and completely different words come out. It’s like watching a badly dubbed foreign movie.

I’ll spare you and my fingers the rest of the plot. You probably only care about the birth scene anyway.

So What About The Birth Scene?

Yikes! Major trauma. It’s a cord around the neck. The baby is convinced it’s going to die. It’s desperately struggling for air in the womb, vainly trying to pull the cord from around it’s neck so it can breath. Now we all know that the baby isn’t yet breathing via  it’s airway, but baby has gotten ahead of itself and is putting to much faith in the Doctor’s need to be a lifesaver. So the Doc pops his undies over his pants, sticks on a green cape and mask and saves the day super-hero style. Is it any wonder the chance of having a section are pretty much the same as calling the toss of coin. Super hero’s have this irresistible need to feel super. If Batman didn’t have the Joker and Penguin to foil, he’d be harassing speeding motorists and teenagers in malls.

So off to surgery we go.  Once again we have a cutting the cord scene, but this time it’s a life saving manoeuvre as the baby was being suffocated by it! Delayed cord clamping? Lotus birth? No chance. Again the baby looks recently born and not too distressed, so they basically deliver the same scene as in Look Who’s Talking but with caesarian overtones.

Post birth the mother has a brief encounter with the baby (remarkably similar to Monty Python’s Meaning Of Life) and then it’s off to solitary confinement with it. The Mother is crying, the baby is screaming, but what do they know. There’s only one person in charge and it isn’t the mother or the baby.

Finally as the baby lies in its incubator the penny has started to drop. “First a lousy birth and now this. Jeez, life sucks.” Quite right too.